Conquering Fear:the Pre-Requisite For Success
Posted: Monday, November 24, 2008
by Sulagna Dasgupta
Love in India
It is official now. The single most important factor that determines whether you're able to realize your full potential or not, is fear. In almost all cases, it's basically the fear of failure, which manifests itself in many different forms, like fear of the unknown, fear of taking risks, fear of stepping out of your comfort zone, fear of doing what you've never done beforeand the list can go on.
Now the good news. While fear limiting people's lives and possibilities is common, it is absolutely possible to learn to be absolutely fearless. Let me tell you how.
Crazy for success: The first prerequisite of tackling your fear is that your desire for success must be far greater than your fear of failure. Otherwise you can't even begin to think about getting your jitters under control. If your urge to succeed is really fierce, you'll naturally feel desperate to get over every negative feeling, because you know, "I'll have to find a way to succeed , in spite of all my difficulties."
Following the giants: If you feel overwhelmed by your fear of failure, tell yourself that there really isn't any successful person in the world, whose path has been a bed of roses right from the beginning to the end. Show me one great person who has never failed in any of her endeavors. The only difference between the truly great and the rest is that they have always (and I mean always, which might well be thousands of times-think of Thomas Edison.) been able to get up after falling, and they have always believed in their own abilities.
Buy one get one free: The potential for your greatest success lies in trying new things out, taking up challenges, daring to break the rules and expecting more from yourself than you've so far achieved. And few of these are likely to grant anyone success at the very first go. So failure is a necessary precondition for success. (It's a clich only because it's true.) That's why I say, failure is the product which you must buy to get success, which comes only as a free gift with it!
The head-on crash: If you're afraid of doing something, the thumb rule of tackling fear is to do that thing head-on. This might be a confronting process, but in the end you'll emerge far stronger than before, even if you fail. That's because now you've done that, and you know exactly what it is like. So you know it's not that green-eyed monster you thought it was!
The moment I was waiting for: It is common to be the most afraid of something which is very important and consequently, for which you've prepared very seriously. (e.g. an important meeting, a sporting event etc.)But this is paradoxical-something you'll realize if you put it in the right perspective. After all, you've put so much energy into it, which should be a strong reason for you to feel confident. Secondly, isn't this the moment you were waiting for? Isn't this a brilliant opportunity for you to prove yourself? Next time you're afraid on the eve of such an all-important event, ask yourself, would you like it better if you didn't have to participate in it? You'll then find your whole self saying, "NO!" This will automatically make you feel more confident and positive about the occasion.
The war and the warrior: Finally let me caution you against a commonly held misconception-it's not a good idea to try to beat your fear by telling yourself that your task is easy, unless you know that it really is. If you kid yourself by making a truly challenging task a child's play in your imagination, you run the risk of going cold while actually facing it-cause you'll find it much tougher than your mental picture would have it. In such cases you should tell yourself, "It's not going to be easy, it's not going to a cakewalk. It's going to be a war. But I'm a warrior too, and I'll be carrying all my weapons and ammunition. I'll emerge bruised, but victorious."
A tiny little bit of fear (as long as it is jitters' and not panic' or terror') is healthy. You're a little afraid about doing something important means you realize it's full import. This in turn implies that you'll prepare yourself accordingly, which'll produce better outcomes. But when your fear becomes your master, rather than the other way round, the result is a not-fully-realized self, and an unfulfilled life. So I'm sure you'll put the strategies learnt above to use, which will help you create a much more fear-free life, and that would translate into more confidence, bolder decisions, smarter actions and finally, better results and a happier life.
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Top-level comments on this article: (1 total)Great! I really like the style of your article writing. Why? Because you write from your own daily life experiences. That's why your points are unusual. People may accept it or not as its not 'usually expected' points. But you do not have the fear...(fear of failure). But I agree with most of the points that you have mentioned.Good job Sulagna! Keep writing...May God Bless you abundantly...Thanks a lot Candles..No matter how few readers I get for my articles I always find that you're very prompt to read and comment on my new articles. I can't tell you how encouraging and heart-warming it is.I'm glad that you like my style and find it unique and original. Thanks again. :)Common! You should know that I am an Indian & also Kolkattan... Will be more happy to see an Indian writing so well. It doesnt mean that I don't like foreign writers...Anyway God bless you...
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